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143,889 notes 

  • parents: why are you awake so early
  • me: who said i went to sleep

37,278 notes 

  • Me: Can I go to the bathroom?
  • Teacher: What for?
  • Me: TO OPEN THE CHAMBER OF SECRETS What do you fucking think for.

68,498 notes 

corgay:

my mom got me these offbrand peeps for easter
and
their faces jesus

corgay:

my mom got me these offbrand peeps for easter

and

their faces jesus

44,552 notes